Ryan Calhoun on Being a Slacker

(Nick’s Notes: Ryan had said this on Facebook a while back and I finally got around to looking at it again and since I’ve been hard at work helping a friend move I figured another lazy-post couldn’t hurt either…)

Because Surrealism.

Slacking means a freer life.

It means a life in which spontaneity is not a vague philosophical concept, but one which you practice in your daily life. Think of those activities which the slacker tends to shirk and avoid as ropes, each with various lengths and strengths. Those who are enamored with the virtues of work demand that you keep all ropes that bind you stretched to their maximum capacities at all times, but no one ever tells you why except as a religious or moralistic command or duty. A person’s life is thus shaped by these ropes of work, these chains which demand your suffering and conformity.

Here, the term slacker is quite apt, as the term “slack” originates in the tightness of thread The slacker, either through natural compulsion or through ascent to the anti-work position, makes the ropes of her life conform in all possible manner to her wants and desires, her wake up time, her breaks, her days off, her most comfortable work attire. The slacker enjoys the slack of the rope, of letting loose. People implore the slacker that if he lets loose of his ropes, she is sure to fall. But the slacker knows her limitations, her desires, her pace, when to move and when to sit. Most importantly she knows that people at the ends of their own rope end up hanged by them.

Let loose of your rope. Stop your mad dash to the achievement of the American Dream or God’s plan. The only dream worth having is your own, the only plan worth having is one which accords with your own spontaneous nature. Do not be pulled around by the demands of rope holders, whether they be human or “natural”, moral or practical.

Control your life, become a slacker.

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